I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how women often compare themselves to other women. I myself have struggled with this and it has caused me to make some changes in my life, some good and some bad.

When I see what other women/moms are doing, I sometimes try to do whatever it is they do. (Hello, Pinterest!) I don’t do it because I am self-conscious, I do it because I see all the cool things everyone else is doing and think that my children/family must be deprived because I don’t always do what others do.

For example, I remember when I used to spend a lot of my free time browsing different blogs. One mom homeschooled her children and everything she used to teach or did with her children she pretty much made herself. Oh and her meals were always healthy and homemade too. Her day-to-day life looked a little like this:

Healthy breakfast from scratch: check.

Amazing lesson on adding using handmade manipulatives: check.

Delicious, healthy snack: check.

Another amazing lesson using handmade tools: check.

Meanwhile I'm over here like…

Sucking at life: check.

Another blog I looked at was a mom who was super amazing at crafting. She could take a dumpy table from Goodwill and turn into something that looked like a million bucks. She could sew clothes and toys for her kids, curtains and pillows for her house, burp cloths and carseat covers for baby... the DIY projects never ended!

I try to sew a simple square and end up crying and breaking needles. Yes, I am awesome. 

Last example: a blog with a mom who is always looking flawless: beautifully curled hair, killer, toned body, amazing outfit and perfect accessories. Most of the time I’m lucky if I wash my hair and get out of my PJs. Meanwhile there are moms out there who look like supermodels every single day, regardless of their schedule. HOW?!?!?!

Anyways, my point is with all of us being so open to share the highlights of our lives (and some getting paid to share their amazingness with others), it’s really hard not to compare and feel a little down every now and then.

Also, how many articles can you find about parenting and how what you are doing is wrong? One minute I’m reading an article that says time out is a good thing, the next I find a different article that says if I use time out my kid will have issues. When can I ever feel good about what I am doing?

Someone will always be a more patient mom. Someone will always have a nicer house. Someone will always be craftier. Someone will always have more fashionable clothes. Someone will always be doing something that I am not or doing it better than I am.

On this note, I have reflected a lot on Elder Uchtdorf’s talk, “Forget Me Not”. I love what he says:

“I want to tell you something that I hope you will take in the right way: God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect.

Let me add: God is also fully aware that the people you think are perfect are not.

And yet we spend so much time and energy comparing ourselves to others—usually comparing our weaknesses to their strengths. This drives us to create expectations for ourselves that are impossible to meet. As a result, we never celebrate our good efforts because they seem to be less than what someone else does.”

I love this quote. It is 100% true. I find myself setting completely unrealistic expectations for myself and I know being involved in social media is definitely a big contributor to that.

We can’t compare our struggles and weaknesses to the things that others excel at. It’s not fair and nothing good will come from it. I think it’s also important to realize that while others do things you don’t do, there are parts of their lives that are probably lacking (some that you may be doing great at!) that they don't post about or share on social media.

Recently, I opened an Etsy shop. I have hardly made any sales but it was a lot of work getting the shop open. Before opening my shop, my apartment was almost always clean. Not spotless, but I don’t like to be surrounded by a mess so it was important to me to keep things tidy.

Now that I have started working on my Etsy store, my apartment often looks like a bomb went off. I never used to be able to go to sleep without a clean kitchen and now I can’t tell you how many times I have woken up in the morning to a sink full of dirty dishes.

I have found that while I have started something I am proud of, there are other parts of my life that I am no longer able to keep up with. My clean apartment is no more. I have a hard time keeping up with laundry too, and like I mentioned, I have just barely started this endeavor!

My point is: something’s gotta give. While others spend a lot of time on things you may not have the time, interest, or talents for, there are other areas of their lives that are probably neglected. We have to stop comparing ourselves to everyone else – no one is perfect, no matter how wonderful their blog, Facebook or Instagram may seem!

The mom who always looks perfect may spend more time getting ready than you do because you spend a little more time reading or doing something else that you enjoy. Maybe while she is curling her hair, you are spending one-on-one time with your kids or keeping up on your housework.

The mom who makes everything from scratch may always have a dirty kitchen. While she enjoys spending a lot of time making delicious, homemade meals, you may rather keep things simple and also keep your house a little cleaner too.

The mom who is the DIY master may have more free time than you because you work out of the home. Maybe you have to work to provide for your family so the time you have at home is spent with your kids rather than on hobbies.

The mom who homeschools her kids may not have time to worry about her appearance, which may be something that is important to you. Maybe she spends more time teaching her kids while you choose to put your kids in preschool. Perhaps you find yourself as a happier, more patient mom when you have that little break from your children whereas the homeschool mom may get anxious thinking of anyone else as her children's teacher.

Please don’t misunderstand: I am not saying we should look at others and judge them for the things they do. I am saying we shouldn’t judge ourselves for the things we don’t do. 

We should celebrate the talents we have. We should feel confident knowing we are doing what we feel is best for our family, regardless of what online articles say. We should appreciate the talents of others and take the opportunity to learn from them, but also feel good about the things we have to offer others too.

Pres. Uchtdorf said, “God wants to help us to eventually turn all of our weaknesses into strengths, but He knows that this is a long-term goal. He wants us to become perfect... It’s OK that you’re not quite there yet. Keep working on it, but stop punishing yourself.”

I want to be a little more open about my failures in life so others may realize and find comfort that they are not the only ones who have struggles. (Sometimes it's a success if we all end up alive and fed by the end of the day - am I right?!) I also want to celebrate my successes more often than I do so I can build myself up rather than constantly tear myself down.

I may not be as crafty, smart, patient, pretty, etc. as others, but no one is perfect at every single one of those things. We all have struggles. We are all here to learn and grow and the next time I see someone who truly looks like they have it all I just need to remember my own little motto I have personally realized is so very true:

Something’s Gotta Give!

Toddler-Friendly Scripture Study: Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Abinadi and King Noah

Song: Stand for the Right (CS, 159) (One of the songs for the Primary Program this year!) 

Our prophet has some words for you,

And these are the words, “Be true, be true.”

At work or at play,

In darkness or light,

Be true, be true,

And stand for the right.

Simple ASL Actions found here

(For “Be true” I will just do “true” rather than both “be” and “true” because I think that is too fast for my little guy!)

Activities:

1. Printables Figures

Summary: (compliments printable figures)

1. This is King Noah. He was a wicked king. King Noah had many priests who helped him rule. They were wicked too. This is Abinadi. Abinadi was a prophet. He was sent by God to tell King Noah’s people to repent.  

2. King Noah made Abinadi come to his palace. King Noah and his priests asked Abinadi many questions.

3. Abinadi was not afraid. He answered their questions. King Noah wanted to kill Abinadi, but God protected Abinadi so he could finish his message. He read the commandments. He told them Jesus would be born. He told them to repent.

4. One of King Noah’s priests, named Alma, believed Abinadi. Alma asked King Noah to let Abinadi go. This made King Noah angry. He sent servants to kill Alma. Alma ran away and hid.

5. Abinadi was brought before the king again. King Noah told him to take back what he said. Abinadi would not take it back. He had spoken the truth. He said he would rather die than take back what he said.

6. King Noah had Abinadi killed. Before Abinadi died, he told King Noah he would die by fire, just like Abinadi.

7. Later, King Noah made his people angry. They tied King Noah to a tree and burned him to death, just like Abinadi said. Abinadi was a true and courageous prophet.

2. Coloring page found here. Another coloring page found here, but this one is kind of creepy to me haha.

Additional Activities: (not in the lesson plan, but still good!)
Testimony Building Activity

Video about Joseph F. Smith – shows great courage, just like Abinadi!

Scripture Figure – could use for Abinadi. You could use reteach the things that Abinadi taught

Scripture Study Outline

Again, if you haven't read my initial post, read it here. This outline is very brief. The link will lead to an explanation of the scripture study and gives more information for how to teach it. 

1. Preview the chapter with a picture walk. (Explanation found here.) Introduce the song by listening to it a couple times and humming to the tune.

2. Read through the story in the manual. Ask questions and take time to look at the pictures as you read. Take as many days as needed to read the whole chapter. End by listening to/singing the song.

3.  Have your child color the printable figures and/or coloring pages while you read sections of the story from the actual scriptures. Take as many days as needed to read through the passages. End each day by singing the song.

4. (Cut out colored printable figures in advance. Optional: Tape them to straws/popsicle sticks.) Share the summary as you hold up the printable figures. Repeat a few times. Ask questions about each figure. (i.e. “Who is this?”, “Was King Noah a good king?”, “What did Abinadi teach?”) See if they can repeat some or parts of the summary back to you. End by singing the song.

           

5. Watch the scripture story video. Talk about Abinadi’s testimony and his courage to stand for the right. End by reading your favorite verse from the passages and singing the song.

6. Have child try to retell the story using the figures, helping them as needed. Read a favorite verse from this story two times and have your child read it with you the second time. Share your testimony. End by singing the song.

Toddler-Friendly Scripture Study: Chapter 13

Chapters 13: Zeniff

If you haven't read my initial post, read it here. It explains the scripture study plan in a little more detail and gives more information for how to teach it. 

Song: Did You Think to Pray? (Hymn #140, chorus only)

Oh, how praying rests the weary. (lay head on hands like you are sleeping)

Prayer will change the night to day. (fold arms for “prayer”, then sign “day”)

So, when life gets dark and dreary, (make a sad face)

Don’t forget to pray (shake head “no”, fold arms)

Activities:

1. Letter Match-Up (using vocabulary from the story)
For this activity, we just use our magnetic ABC letters. 

Art/Craft: Coloring page found here

 

Scripture Study Outline

Again, if you haven't read my initial post, read it here. This outline is very brief. The link will lead to an explanation of the scripture study and gives more information for how to teach it. 

1. Preview the chapter with a picture walk. (Explanation found here.) Introduce the song by listening to it a couple times and humming to the tune.

2. Read through the story in the manual. Ask questions and take time to look at the pictures as you read. Take as many days as needed to read the whole chapter. End by listening to/singing the song.

3.  Have your child color one of the coloring pages and/or do the letter match-up while you read sections of the story from the actual scriptures. (Use the scriptural references found under the pictures in the manual as a guide.) Take as many days as needed to read through the passages. End each day by singing the song.

           

4. Watch the scripture story video. Talk about the faith of the Nephites, what they did when they were in danger and what happened as a result. End by reading your favorite verse from the passages.

5. Read a favorite verse from this story two times and have your child read it with you the second time. Summarize the chapter as you look back through the pictures and share your testimony about an important lesson learned. End by singing the song.